“My husband says I look too mumsy”
Is he being helpful or rude?
By Practical Parenting team
October 15 2018
A woman was taken aback by a comment her husband made about her appearance, and asked fellow mums what they thought about his observations.
“My husband and I were talking about relationships in general and the fact that some couples in the school our daughters go to have split up in the last year or two,” she wrote on Mumsnet.
“He made a comment to me that lately I am looking 'too mumsy' - I get the impression he thinks I am looking frumpy and should lift my game. What do you think? Should I feel offended or is he just being honest? He was also making comments about how women with kids always cut their hair short.”
Mums were quick to respond, but had a very mixed reaction.
“Ouch. Mumsy to his children...he really shouldn't complain. You don't need to up your game, he does!,” said one. “Connecting the comment to how he thinks you look to the news of people splitting up is awful, I'd be very offended.”
“Do you go home every night to 200 pound of rippling muscle or is your DH lying on the sofa playing his phone eating biscuits? Is he too dadsy?” asked another.
Some mums said that she should be thankful for the heads-up, and take the opportunity to spoil herself.
“I don't really see what is wrong with him saying it. It isn't like he was mean about it, just pointing it out. I'd much rather be told,” said one.
“He's being honest. Ask him to elaborate and most definitely treat yourself. Personally, I appreciate honesty so I would not be bothered by this,” said another.
Some still felt that the problem lay with the husband, however, rather than the woman’s appearance.
“F*cking hell. I think I've woken up in the fifties. I can't believe people are telling you to get your hair done, and buy some nice clothes.”
Many also asked if her husband had become “too dadsy.”
“To answer your question, yes he is looking 'dadsy',” the woman responded. “He has put on weight in the past year or so. I was too shocked to comment back I think when he said I look 'mumsy'.”
“Well you're going to have to go right back at him. Tell him he looks dadsy and has put on a lot of weight, so why don't you both work on it together,” one commenter suggested.