Mum goes on Facebook to try to swap her girl embryo for a boy – so her son can get a brother
A lot of people are outraged by this
By Practical Parenting team
November 04 2018
A mum has revealed how she is trying to swap her girl embryo for a boy – so her son can have a brother.
The woman, who calls herself ‘Lisa’ as she doesn't want to reveal her true identity, has struggled with infertility for nine years and already has one son. She is desperate for another boy to complete her family but only has one frozen embryo left for IVF to use and that is a girl.
She’s now trying to find a mum, through Facebook, who also has frozen embryos in storage, and will swap her a girl for a boy.
She reveals that her son had asked her, “When am I going to get another brother?”
And so she started a search for the male embryo of a stranger.
She wrote on fertility Facebook groups “Hello, we have been trying to give my child a sibling for three years . . . we want to complete our family with a son. We have a great quality female embryo. Would you like to consider a trade?”
There’s been plenty of outrage and people complained to forum moderators so her post was removed from one group’s page.
However, Lisa was contacted by a 40-something California woman interested in a potential swap.
“She already has a toddler, and she has two male embryos left over,” said Lisa.
“Her husband… has six sons from another marriage and then they have a boy together. Her husband said: ‘If we are going to go through this again, it’s going to be a girl!”
Lisa reveals that she has been desperate for another boy since she had her last male embryo implanted in 2017 but she suffered a miscarriage.
“I haven’t really gotten over it,” she told the New York Daily Post. “Since the miscarriage, I’ve been stuck on a boy.
“We’ve saved all this boy stuff,” she added.
“Some of it has emotional significance like Daniel’s first little snow suit which [looks like] a teddy bear. Then there’s the first outfit he came home from the hospital in.”
“He’s our world and a beautiful child,” said Lisa. “But, as soon as he could talk, he was asking for a sibling. Every time he sees other kids — there’s a lot in our family and in our neighbourhood — he is like: ‘He has a brother. Why don’t I have a brother?’
She is unfazed by criticisms from people astounded she would give up her biological potential child and raise someone else’s, purely because of a gender preference.
“It doesn’t really matter,” she said. “I think if I carry the baby, I would have a bond. I know so many women who have gone through IVF with donor eggs and that’s their child. A friend, who is white and Jewish, adopted a black child. That’s his son. That bond is unbreakable.”