Mums reveal what they wish they'd known before giving birth

“It can take time before you bond with your baby”

November 08 2018

In a very candid online forum, women have shared they things they wish they had known before having their babies.

The thread was started on Mumsnet by a mum who revealed she’d struggled with postpartum depression, and felt that her experience might have gone a bit better had she been more prepared.

“I wanted to put together a list of the things that I'd wish I'd known before giving birth. I'm hoping that this can help me and others by talking openly about it,” the mum wrote.

“I know a couple of full-time mothers (me included) who struggled a lot postpartum and I genuinely think that I would've felt a lot easier if I'd been more prepared about the birth.”

Other mums were quick to respond and empathise with the women.

“That it's just really really hard and when people say it's all worth it and it's the best thing ever they mean that it is in retrospect and it's ok to think that you're not having a great time!” wrote one commenter.

“Getting back to normal isn't possible - there is a new normal. And that new normal will will keep changing, but kiss your pre-kids life goodbye and stop trying to live it as you had done before and you will be happier,” wrote another.

Many talked about how it can take time before bonding with your baby occurs – and it’s not instantaneous for everyone.

“That I wouldn’t necessarily feel a rush of love for this child when I was handed him. It did come about 4 weeks later when i was … crying my eyes out because he was due some injections and I didn’t want anyone to hurt him,” added another mum.

Some were very blunt about the physical changes and discomfort you can experience post-birth.

“How painful going to the toilet for weeks afterwards would be,” shared one mum.

Many said that they wished people hadn’t offered birth horror stories before they’d had their babies however, saying everyone’s experience is different, and it may not be as bad as you think.

What do you wish you had known before having your first baby?