Mum puts an end to 'only child' shaming in one post

She doesn’t 'just' have one child, she has one amazing daughter.

March 22 2017

For all the other Mama's with one child, I wonder if you can relate. I have been struggling with a lot of guilt. I'm going to be real. Real honest. I don't know if I want another child. There I said it. And, well, the world didn't end. But, I know some people will read this and think, "What! How can she say that?!" And, I guess I should stop giving a shit about what others think, right?! But, if there's one thing I would love, is for parents to stop judging and start supporting one another. Whether you have none, one or ten kids, will we ever stop with the assumptions, "advice," and judgey Mcjudgerson comments? As parents, we chose our paths. We aren't going to do things the same. What works for one family, won't work for another. So, today, I'm putting a piece of my heart out there because maybe one other person is feeling the same as me. Our words hold incredible power, so choose them carefully. Little Word, Big Meaning... I have heard it many times. From many people. Most are moms around my age. Most have two, three, or four children. We begin an innocent conversation. Then the question comes. The question I despise. The question that makes my skin crawl. "Oh. You just have the one?" Yes, I have one child. And please, don't ask me why. Why is none of your business. My husband and I have made the decision to have one child. That may change. It may not. Again. None of your business. What bothers me most about this question is one little word. A word that holds tremendous weight. A word that lessens the value of myself, and my child. Four letters that make my heart drop. JUST. I don't JUST have one child. I have one child. I have one daughter. One amazing daughter. One hilarious daughter. One kind-hearted daughter. One joyous daughter. I have one daughter who fills my heart with so much love, my heart could explode. I have one daughter who completes our family. I have one daughter who has made our family "The Three Amigos." I have one daughter who is not "JUST" anything. So, before you ask someone if they have "just" one child, consider the weight of your words. Consider the many reasons why couples choose to have one child. Consider why we measure our value as parents by the number of children we have. Simply put... Remove your judgement. Remove your opinon. Remove your assumptions. Remove the JUST.

Alyce explains she and her husband made the decision to have one child together and doesn’t want people asking her why.

But what “bothers” her the most is that “one little word”.

“A word that holds tremendous weight. A word that lessens the value of myself, and my child: JUST.”

As Alyce points out, the "just" isn’t necessary.

“I have one daughter,” she says. “One amazing daughter; one hilarious daughter; one kind-hearted daughter; one joyous daughter.”

“I have one daughter who fills my heart with so much love, my heart could explode. I have one daughter who completes our family. I have one daughter who has made our family ‘The Three Amigos.’

“I have one daughter who is not ‘JUST’ anything.”