Real Mum's Guide To A Clean House

Forget those unrealistic chore charts on Pinterest.

February 06 2017


  • “Check couch cushions for food.
  • Smell check in the car for rotting milk or sippy cups.
  • Consider washing your sheets but leave them in the washing mashing for three or four days rotting.
  • Pile recycling next to the trash can that’s already overflowing.
  • Swipe a cleaning wipe across the bathroom counter – this is a must, toothpaste and small children don’t mix.
  • Consider vacuuming and mopping but don’t."



  • “Consider burning your own house down.
  • Cry.
  • Spend an entire day cleaning because you are so far behind and it takes you all day
  • Forbid your child to come home.
  • Release they have to come home.
  • Cry.
  • Repeat.”


Now, this is a schedule we can get behind.